More Therapy

***TMI ALERT***

(By the way, TMI stands for "Too Much Information". You have been warned!)

Remember all the delicious foods that go along with the holidays?

Yeah. Me too. I remember them. I ate them. ALL of them. Seemingly nonstop for nearly a month.

Don't misunderstand... I enjoyed myself!

EVERY.
SINGLE.
OVERINDULGENT.
BITE!

Of course...having ingested vast amounts of holiday goodies left me with some very much unwanted weight. This weight prompted me and a friend to begin a search for a garment. One such garment that might help to shield our excesses from the world until we were able to rid ourselves of it!

This search led us to Spanx.

We perused the site but I was a bit scared, so only my friend made the order.

When the package arrived at her house, we were eager to see what was inside. Imagine our surprise when she pulled it out and realized it was crotchless!

Not since our high school days, when my friend and I went into a Frederick's on a dare had I beheld anything sans crotch. AND since there was nothing even remotely sexy about this garment, I was intrigued as to why that important area was missing. As we read the tag, I began to realize that this was to aid in the responding to calls of nature. In fact, the tag actually said something along those lines. This garment was made so that it did not have to be removed when going to the restroom.

Well! I am here to tell you... Do NOT believe the hype! Whatever you do, EVEN IF YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT, do not -- I repeat, DO NOT -- attempt to use the restroom while wearing the garment. According to my friend (who shall definitely remain anonymous), it will NOT end well.

My advice: just let your fat roll show until you get motivated enough to get rid of it. I can assure you, I will be employing this tactic from now on!

So after I got down rolling around on the floor, laughing at my poor friend as she shared her traumatic experience with me, I am currently seeking therapy to deal with my new found fears of both restrooms and shaping garments. Will keep you posted.