* you reach into your coat pocket, you pull out a Matchbox car, purple crayon, My Little Pony barrette, and used tissue before you fish out your car keys.
* the only writing utensil in your purse is a red Crayola marker.
* your spouse calls your purse your "five-day bag" because it's so massive and holds so many "I-may-need-this-someday" things.
* you only have Scooby Doo, VeggieTale, and Dora the Explorer bandaids.
* you where above stated, children bandaids to your professional place of employment.
* in a pinch, you are willing to wipe your wee ones snotty nose with your bare hand -- and you don't gag or even think twice about it.
* your idea of a relaxing Saturday morning includes grocery shopping without the wee ones.
* Perkins or Applebee's is considered a "fancy" restaurant.
* you consider it a major accomplishment to get out of the house in the morning with a clean shirt free of children's bodily fluids or latest meal.
And last but not least,
* you sing along to the VeggieTales CD in the mini-van AFTER you've already dropped off the wee ones.