Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Screaming!

I heard my son scream, then yell MOM at the top of his ever-loving, healthy lungs from his bedroom. I could tell by how many O’s he put in his "mom" that he was about to throw one of his sisters under the bus. I instantly went into a fight or flight response. 
I chose to flee.  I had been fighting with the wee ones all day and I was quickly becoming a sore loser.  As Little Man came barreling out of his room, letting another long-winded MOOOOOOOOOOOOM roll off his tongue, I hid behind the front door. 
My racing mind began to ask all of its normal questions in a attempt to block out the non-stop screaming of children constantly trying to tattle on each other.  How did I get here again? How can I learn to manage this "normal" and excessively irritating sibling rivalry?  Every time I sit in front of my laptop (to do a little something for myself), they smell it. They incessantly hunt me down and hound me, gnawing at my ankles like a rabid chihuahua, until I have no choice but to abandon my task.  Constant interruptions mixed with the drudgery of daily chores had once again taken over and stopped me in my tracks. I was trapped – not only behind the depressing sight of my skinny jeans but in my world where doing something for me is forbidden. As my mind went silent from defeat, I noticed an odd sound; kids, playing together without fighting. While I was throwing myself a pity party in the dark, the conflict that had made me stuff myself in the closet had resolved itself  – I emerged enlightened.
 I realized my children will survive if I don’t referee every fight. For that matter they would most likely survive if I don’t answer every call for mom, do every dish or make every bed – everyday. So, why do I keep doing it? Maybe I am a victim of the routine – the monotonous stay-at-home mom daily drudge that, after years, lulls your mind into a trance until your actions are robotic and each day is a carbon copy of the next.  This routine overrides rational thinking and replaces it with the urge to make chores priority. We allow the routine to lead us into a world of cooking and cleaning because our children deserve to eat healthy and dwell in a sterile environment. So we follow the path of carbon copy day’s barely feeling the cuts from thorns or itch of poison ivy until we find ourselves hiding in the closet from our kids. I am at constant odds with the routine – every time I try to clear a better path by doing something for me, the routine calls and I am pulled back into the thickets.

Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Big-Hair Bands

It's been a while since I've posted for Tuesdays Tunes (formerly known as Lyric Tuesdays).  I love to share songs that I enjoy.  Sometimes it's because I love the lyrics and they mean something to me.  Other times, it's because I simply enjoy the memories that I experience when I listen to the songs.

This week's song doens't particularly mean anything to me.  I simply love remembering how carefree I was in the late 80's and early 90's when I was in love with all things "big-hair-boy-bands".  So let's enjoy the eye candy of Mark Slaughter as Slaughter belts out "Up All Night".



"Up All Night" by Slaughter

And when morning comes
Up all night, sleep all day
Up all night, sleep all day

When evening comes I am alive
I love to prowl around in the streets
It's the moonlight that controls my mind
Now I've got the power to speak

Awake from dusk to dawn
Watching the city lights
Stars are shining down
They'll be shining down
On you and I
And when the morning comes
And I'll hold you
'Til the morning light

Everybody sing it now
Up all night, sleep all day
Up all night, sleep all day

Driving down the boulevard
All alone
The neon signs
Are calling your name
Find me in the corner
Having the time of my life
You'd think you'd wanna do the same

Up all night, sleep all day
Up all night, sleep all day
Maybe we can just stay up
Twenty four hours a day
Up all night, sleep all day
Up all night, sleep all day

(Land where my fathers died
Land of the pilgrim's pride
From every mountain site
Let freedom ring)

Monday, September 27, 2010

Security

"Security is an illusion. Life is either a daring adventure or it is nothing at all."


~ Helen Keller

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Hot n Cold Revisited

I love it!!!

Not too long ago, I posted a Tuesday's Tunes with Kate Perry's song "Hot n' Cold". Well, it appears that Ms. Perry has moved on from her crazy on-again, off-again beau from her video to Sesame Street's favoritest, furry red monster, Elmo.  Listen to the changed lyrics...  Enjoy!



Saturday, September 25, 2010

Two Peas In A Pod

Little Princess and Little Man were sitting at the kitchen table eating an afternoon snack last week, when suddenly they decided that they weren't close enough. So Little Man got off his chair and pushed it closer to Princess. He kept pushing it until their chairs were touching and there was no wiggle room between.


Little Man (smiling proudly): "Princess! Now we are sitting RIGHT by each other AND we can still eat our snack!"

Princess: "Hey Buddy! Someday we won't get to eat right by each other any more. We might both live in our own houses."

Little Man: "Ohhh..."

I think my jaw dropped open in shock and I almost started sobbing. It was almost as if Little Princess decided to play a game with Little Man… “How many of Mommy's saddest thoughts can we say out loud?"

Me: "Princess! As adults, we can still have lunch with our brothers or sisters and I could even go sit next Auntie while eating if I wanted to."

Princess (totally unaffected): "Oh. Okay. Well then, you can eat at my house if you want, Little Man. We can eat ramen noodles always."

Me (Because I can't let anything go, E-V-E-R): "As a matter of fact, Princess, you and Little Man can live here forever, if you want. No one needs to get their own house. You can stay with Mommy and Daddy forever!" I smile triumphantly!

Yes, yes! I’m ashamed to admit that I really, truly said that out loud to my beautiful, independent wee ones.

Princess (looks at Little Man): "Okay, Mommy.” (short pause as she glances at Little Man) “But we will get our own houses, Buddy."

Ouch, ouch, ouch. Really?!?!?

Praise Jesus for independent and head-strong children.

Friday, September 24, 2010

How To Clean the Children's Bedroom


How a Crazed Mom Cleans Her Children’s Bedroom:

Step 1: Tell children it’s time to clean their rooms. Watch kids scatter. (Why, YES, my children choose to live in self-imposed squalor!)

Step 2: Make children pick stuff up. Insert earplugs to mute the excessive whining.

Step 3: Leave room. Close door. Hope wee ones do not maim each other while you mix cocktails. (Hey, it’s 5 o’clock SOMEWHERE!) Notice out of corner of your eye small child making a break for it.

Step 4: Check back a bit later (after a quick shower) and see this:


Step 5: Take a step back and breathe deeply. Notice that there is a clear path from the door to the bed.

Realize that this is all I’m going to get from them today. Decide that this will do… for now.

Pat yourself on the back for a job well done. Celebrate with an iced tea. (Or cocktail. Whatever.) Commence relaxation on davenport.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

I Love Blogging!

I've always been a fan of the one-liners that accompany lists such as "You Know You're A Redneck if...", You Know You're a Minnesotan if...", "You Know You're No Longer A Child if..." so I was excited to read Mommy Monologues list "You Know You're A Blogger When..."

Here is her list...  LOVE IT!!!

May 28, 2010
You Know You're A Blogger When...



1. All of your sentences start with "I was reading this blog today..." and all you get are blank stares from people in the "real" world. Because let's face it, they just don't get it! 

2. You tell a friend or a family member about something that you swear you haven't already told them & before you can even spit the whole story out they've said, "I know. I read it on your blog." 

3. You know that Heather from Theta Mom Community or the ladies from SITS are a big deal!

4. When people in your "real" life don't know about the aforementioned ladies you are literally stunned because these women feel almost like blogging celebs to you.

5. You have a conversation with a girlfriend or your husband or even a random stranger & half way through the convo you realize that this could be an amazingly, AWESOME blog post. So you excuse yourself, go running as fast as you can to your blogging notebook & start jotting down the idea--and whoever you were talking to at the time thinks you're nuts. But you don't care because you like totally know you're going to get like a gazillion comments from the brillant idea you just scribbled down! 

6. You look forward to turning on your computer in the morning because you can't wait to see what all your "bloggy girlfriends" have written for the day!

7. You lust after google followers like you do Calvin Klein models.

8. You carry your camera with you, EVERYWHERE, because hey the baby might do something friggin' cute & you don't want to miss a thing, just in case it's a cute pic for the blog (which again would garner comments--which you lust after almost as much as those google followers.)

9. The baby is asleep. The house is quiet. It would be the perfect time for a bubble bath & a good book. Too darn bad your computer can't go in the tub with you because let's face it you'd really rather blog!

10. You are inspired by the thoughts & words of mere strangers. That one moment of inspiration leads you to make a comment. That one comment turns into emailing. Emailing turns into friendship-- all because of the power of the written word!

I'm glad I'm a "Blogger" & even more glad to "Know" All of You!!!

Source: Mommy Monologues

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Versatile Blogger Award

Oh! You like me!  You really truly like me!

(Please pause for a moment to fully capture the mental image of me literally jumping up and down and clapping my hands in euphoria...)


I love blogging and, having said that, most of the time I doubt that other folks actually read what spouts out of me.  So you can imagine my extreme pleasure and excitement when I received a message from Vickie at Victoria's Voice notifying me that she thought I was worthy of the Versatile Blogger Award!  What a sweetheart! 

Thank you, Vickie!  Check out her blog...



The rules for winning this award are as follows:

* Thank and link back to the person who gave you the award.

* Share 7 things about yourself.

* Pass the award along to 15 other bloggers who you recently discovered and think are fabulous.

* Contact the bloggers you chose and let them know about the award.



Seven Things About Me:
1. I secretly wish to be a monster truck driver.

2. I abhor ketchup.  Seriously ICKY!

3. If I could have one super power, I would want to be able to fly.

4. As I young child, I would hide in my bedroom closet reading with a flashlight -- hoping my parents wouldn't find me so I could stay up until the wee hours of the morning reading, reading, reading.

5. Because I am quite allergic to fresh-cut grass, I never have to the mow the lawn.  Husband has to so I don't go into a coughing, sneezing fit.

6. After my children grow up and move out, I want to become a foster parent.

7. Although I give lip-service to entertaining the thought of allowing the children to get a dog, I think I'm lying to them and most likely myself.  I am a content "feline-only" household.


Now for the 15 Bloggers that I feel deserve this award


Thanks again to Vickie at Victoria's Voice!

Monday, September 20, 2010

Promise


I promise I will get my act together 
and update my blog tomorrow.  
But right now... I'm just so very exhausted.  
Too tired to pick up my head or type.  

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Precocious

Here is a picture of my super adorable and super precious wee ones leftover from Easter.




And here is a sampling of some of the lovely conversations we've had within the past couple of weeks.  Adorable, aren't they?


Little Man: Mommy, do you have a baby in your tummy?
Me: No.
Little Man: Then why does your tummy look so big and... so out there?

***

Princess: Mommy, how come Sister’s pancakes are so yummy and yellow, and yours are too dark and tastes funny?

***

Little Man: Mom, the reason I sometimes do bad things is because you're so mean to me. You never buy me toys at Super Target. You know what? If you bought me the toy dinosaurs I want, I'd be good for all day.

***

Princess: Mommy, how come Auntie looks like a princess and you just look like a Mommy? (note: child’s nose was extremely scrunched up…)

***

Big E: Mom, you said you love me more than Ole [our cat], but you sure talk nicer to him!

Saturday, September 18, 2010

Awesome

I love find random things on the internet that everyone else in the world appears to already know about but are new and entertaining to me.  I guess it's all about perspective, right?

My newest discovery is the 1000 Awesome Things blog by Neil Pasricha.  I love it!  From their blog is a description of the book/blog and author...


ABOUT THE BOOK
From neighbors with pools to ordering off the menu at fast-food restaurants to fixing electronics by smacking themThe Book of Awesome takes on life’s sweet feats with all the honest humor and winning enthusiasm that has earned Pasricha’s blog its millions of followers. But while powered along by Pasricha’s distinctive, fresh, and hilarious voice, The Book of Awesome isn’t about one man’s favorite things, but rather a catalog of the universal little pleasures we all share. With its focus on the many things that bring us together rather than the few things that split us apart, it’s a book that will appeal to people from all walks of life — housewives and college kids, children and senior citizens alike. Arising out of Pasricha’s riffs on popping bubble wrap and getting a trucker to blow his horn is an unexpected, genuine sort of inspiration, as The Book of Awesome offers up a hearty cheer for all the little things we take for granted.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Neil Pasricha never imagined that writing about the smell of gasoline, thinking it’s Thursday when it’s really Friday, or wearing underwear just out of the dryer would amount to anything. A self-described “average guy” with a typical 9-to-5 job in the suburbs, Neil started his blog 1000 Awesome Things, as a small reminder — in a world of rising sea levels, global conflict, and a troubled economy — of the free, easy little joys that make life sweet. He certainly didn’t anticipate that his site would gain a readership of millions of people, win two Webby Awards (“the Internet’s highest honor” according to The New York Times), be named one of PC Magazine’s Top 100 Sites, or become a place where people from around the world would come to celebrate the simple pleasures of daily life.
As I glanced around the Top 1000, some of my top finds include:
#940 Terrible businesses run by children

Friday, September 17, 2010

Wedding of the Century

Last Saturday was full of heart-crushing sadness at a morning funeral and extreme bliss as I attended the wedding of the century.  I experienced a cRaZy roller coaster ride of mixed up feelings that covered all levels of human emotions.

Husband's best friend got married last Saturday to the perfect woman.  I absolutely adore this couple.  They totally rock.  Today, I share some pictures from the wedding of the century.  (For more gorgeous wedding pics, click here.)








Wednesday, September 15, 2010

It's Come To This...


"The tongue that brings healing is a tree of life, 
but a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit."

Proverbs 15:4


 

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Thank you!

Yep! Still lots of crying over my dear friend, Kelli. Having a hard time functioning. Please pray for me and more importantly, her family. Thank you!

Should have...

I should have realized. I SO VERY MUCH should have realized the desperateness of her situation...



Monday, September 13, 2010

Sigh!

It's so insane that folks still cannot talk about their mental health issues. Why is mental illness still so taboo? My heart still bleeds for my sweetest friend who killed herself last Wednesday. Why couldn't I help her? Why couldn't she reach out to me or any other of her numerous friends? Why did her NINE YEAR OLD DAUGHTER have to find her dead? Seriously?!?!?!?!?!? As a survivor of a valiant, recent attempt... I don't understand.

Please don't get me wrong. I think it was an accidental overdose, but I still am not finding forgiveness in my heart, which makes me even more angry and upset with her AND MYSELF! I should have recognized the severity of the signs. I should have been there!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I should have there...

Saturday, September 11, 2010

OMG

OMG!!!! I can't stand this.

Please promise me that I will survive this...

Friday, September 10, 2010

Quote of the Week

Sometimes questions are more important than answers.

~ Nancy Willard


See yesterdays quote...

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Beyond Repair


My heart is utterly broken and possibly beyond repair.



A dearest friend committed suicide yesterday morning. Her impossibly innocent and sweet 9-year old daughter found her dead, as well as her six year old son. She leaves behind a husband, 9 year old daughter and 6-year old son.

I'm haunted by the fact that she told me less than two weeks ago, "Ann! I am you! You are me! Please get help. Don't stay in your depression. You can get better. Do it for your kids. GET HELP."

REALLY?!?!??!?!?!

Do NOT tell me to "do it for my kids" if you are going to take yourself out a week or two later. I'm so angry and sad and disappointed and guilty and FUCKING PISSED OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am heart-broken and want more than anything in this world, I want to have just have a few more moments with KF to hug her and tell her that LIFE IS WORTH LIVING.

And on the other hand, I feel like I want to go drink too much and take a tons of pills too. I get the crazy, DUAL, simultaneously thinking that depressed people think -- such as, "you are not enough as a human being so the world would be better without you" AND the sane person thinking who says, "Nothing is that bad in the morning -- hold on until morning."

I am aware that this post doesn't make sense, but I can't help myself.

I am heart broken and sad and devastated and trying to be strong for everyone else -- but what I really want to do is curl up and cry for the next several months. Please pray for my friend and her family.

We all need it.

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Small Vacation


Hello Dear Bloggy Friends,

I am on hiatus from blogging September 8-12. Our fantastic friends are getting married and, seeing as how Husband is Best Man, life is crazy for the next few days.... Lots of love. See you in a few days.



Monday, September 6, 2010

Youthfulness

I will turn 33 on Friday. 33! That number sounds weird to me...

My sweet children have been telling *everyone* that I was turning 21. I think is actually making people think I am going to be much older than I am...

I’m not generally embarrassed about my age. I don’t feel old – well, actually I do feel rather advanced in age, but any who... It just surprises me that I’m in my 30s! Somedays, I feel 23. I don’t feel like I’m old enough to be a responsible homeowner, a wife, a mom to 4 (!) children, a person with a retirement plan.

Recently, while shopping, I stumbled upon a business competition for students. There were these groups of kids standing around wearing their new suits, looking young and nervous. And I could not tell whether it was a high school competition or college competition. That is how old I am!

I’m not old, right? I watch the occasional South Park episode, I’ve seen The Soup. I liked Knocked Up and The Hangover. I have a blog. I’m on Facebook. I’ve heard of the show Jersey Shore. I take my kid to the zoo and am in bed by 11 pm on weekends. I remember the days before everyone had cell phones.

Shoot! I am old!!!

Friday, September 3, 2010

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Rhyming with Pencil

1) Space aliens have landed and have given you a choice: come back to their world without anyone knowing or become their ambassador and introduce them to the people of Earth. Which would you choose? I guess I would have to try my hand at being an ambassador. I'm not ready to give up all of my family and friends, and leave them wondering what happened to me. I hope I'd be able to convince humankind to not kill me because of those dopey aliens.



2) You’ve won a walk-on role on your favorite television show and you get to suggest the new character you play. Which show and what type of character? Hmmm... this is hard! I love Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives with Guy Fieri on the Food Network. It's a fabulous show! I would love to be the owner and executive chef of a delectably delicious restaurant featured on the show.

3) A relative that you never met has died. They have left you an item in their will that they knew you would appreciate. What is the item and why do you like it? The item willed to me would either be family photos or family scrapbooks. I love to preserve family memories. It's very important to me to capture our day to day lives so we can share them with future generations and continue our legacy.

4) What is your favorite midnight snack? Oreos. Preferably peanut butter, double stuffed Oreos!


5) Can you find easily 10 words rhyming with pencil? Ummm... NO! Can you?!